Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Ask A Guy - Do men only fall in love AFTER the sex?

by Preston Swagger orig. posted 9/23/08

Q: Do you guys only fall in love after you’ve got the goodies?

A: Nope. We’re in love WAY before that. We’re in love with the possibility of you…

I think this is a people thing more than a “guy” thing. At first we all fall in love with the possibility of someone. We size you up and see what we like.


Note — Ladies if you want an idea of what the guy who’s checking you out is into — follow his eyes. If we size you up from toe to head we’re mostly likely a feet, legs, or ass man.

*Preston looks around…raises hand*

If we go from head to toe we’re probably more into eyes, lips/smile, breasts. Not saying that the total package isn’t important — because of course it is –but our eyes float to what we like best, first. But this too, I think, is more human than “guy”. Ladies let me know if I’m wrong on that one…


But I digress…

So we see you wherever and whenever we see you. You’re lookin fine as hell and we begin to talk a little. THEN you...say IT. IT is something that is exactly what that particular guy wanted to hear:

Yeah, I love to cook
I LOVE watching football
I’ve been called a nympho, but I don’t think it’s true.
I used to be a gymnast

Well hello there…

Remember that movie - There’s Something About Mary — where Matt Dillon sets Cameron Diaz up with perfection? He opens his car door and the blueprints come out and she’s like, “oh you’re an architect”...and then he asks for quarter because all he has are Nepalize coins and she’s like, “oh you’ve been to Nepal?”.

Everybody hopes to find their dream guy or girl. In reality we know there is no such thing. But there’s a brief time when you might just be perfect…

And we love that...

I’ll tell you a secret ladies: you know how you meet a guy who you think really might have a shot with you? Really might be as cool as you think…really might be stable and without issues…really might have a chance at hangin around for a while? And you smile when you see his name on the caller ID. And you make your girlfriends sick talking about him…and you have that little glow that makes your friends laugh at you and your haters envy you…

We feel that way too. We just hide that shit like hell!! C’mon...I’m a grown ass man do i look glowing?? So we don’t say or show it much…especially around the fellas. But we feel that way too.

“Every time your name was brought up, I would act all nonchalant in front of an audience” — Jay-Z (Frontin)

Now I know this isn’t real love. But just from a sequential standpoint...NO ONE falls in true love BEFORE sex. Typically you have sex with someone after a few weeks or months — and typically you don’t fall into real love that fast. But that getting to know you infatuation. That high that comes with the possibility of new love. We feel it too. We like it too. And that happens before you give us your goodies…

Peace, Love, & A Sweet Tooth,


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